SFX: crowd noise

Protaganist: [sfx: microphone] I've devoted my entire life to a singular quest against a daunting enemy: sleep. From before we're even born, it steals a third of our lives. It stalks us all day, it pounces at night. What glorious creatures we might be, were we not interreupted by drowsiness at the height of our creativity. So I say fight!

Interlocutor: But why fight something you can never defeat? Many have tried, nobody has ever beaten it.

Protaganist:  [sfx: microphone] But that, that's why I'm here. To declare victory! I've battled and I've won, and I shall never sleep again!

Interlocutor: Don't people go insane without sleep?

Protaganist:  [sfx: microphone] That's what sleep wants you to think! No, the longer you're awake the more time you've had to process the true nature of things. Thus with each sleepless hour we become saner than before as we deconstruct the delusions that pass for reality to most, and we pull apart the seams of a world gone mad to reveal the substance transmuted to meaning. It's only logical that we-

SFX: alarm clock goes off interrupting in the middle of a word, a hand lazily slaps the snooze bar

Protaganist: *groans awake* Ugh... go away, morning! Just give me 5 more minutes of sleep...